Tuesday, November 24, 2009
yesterday, i was driving down the street, on my way to absolutely nowhere, when out of the corner of my eye, i spied a hobgoblin infiltrator with a full orange health bar floating over top of his head. i reached down to click my hot bar #7, bringing forth my +4 Longsword of Diabolism and +4 Heavy Metal Shield, readying myself for the attack. it was at that moment that i realized is wasn't a hobgoblin infiltrator at all. it was a woman in a jacket made of some furry substance carrying a silver umbrella. good thing i came to this realization at that exact moment because a few minutes later, i'd have been profusely apologizing to her for attacking her with my dipstick.
Monday, November 23, 2009
people use the term "bird on a wire" to denote a precarious situation. but when you think about it, a bird on a wire isn't that shaky. i mean, look at their little feets. those little claw thingies wrap around a wire just perfectly. and they have a great sense of balance. i mean, they're used to standing on two feet cause well, thats all they have. now....a hyena on a wire is a whole different story. That critter could fall at any minute. so from now on, i'm going to say "hyena on a wire" and you'll know exactly what i'm talking about. ok?
Saturday, November 21, 2009
A gamers hell: your soul, upon death, is relegated to an NPC making you go through eternity trapped in a MMORPG uttering inane comments to 15 year olds. You want to say more than the script calls for. You want to assume your old character and join a party to complete the quest but you're stuck standing outside the dungeon talking to avatars that you know are a front for real live people. Inside, your brain is screaming for escape. Inside, you remember what it was like to belong to the real world. Inside, you die a little more each day in spirit but your soul just won't release.
Just a thought. :)
Just a thought. :)